Close... Yet Distant...

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Surrounded by a cacophony... Movements... Sounds...
But apart from it... Close yet distant...

Becoming lost in the quiet of that noise,
in the darkness within the light... Sinking further...

Do I hear voices..? A name..? A laugh..?

Then... No sight... No Sound... No thoughts...

Floating..?

Falling..?

Lost..?


A jolt..! A noise..!

Wrenched back too fast..!

I gasp for breath..!

Was it my name..? Was it a touch..?

Almost swallowed up by the blanket of nothingness,
that welled from looking inward for too long...

The myst roils back swallowed by that inner void...

And then I'm back... I am aware...

I am surrounded by a cacophony... Movements... Sounds...
But apart from it... Close yet distant...

J. Marshall 12/01/2013

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Hello again,
It's been a while.

Forgive me my prose, I tend not to write creatively anymore...

Not because I don't want to, but because I just haven't been able to push myself to do it for a very long time.

I had a trying time this Winter holiday, there were definitely good things during the season.
And there were difficult things too, tied to my life, my friendships, my relationship and old ghosts back to visit.

But I didn't want to write a post that just amounted to self indulgent whining.

I wanted to be a little more constructive or even informative. So moments ago I decided to write about what it feels like when I begin to close in on myself, when the depression gains the upper hand.

And that is how the poem above came into being...

A little trite I know... And probably more than a little self indulgent...

But... It does go a little way toward trying to describe something that is quite intangible, so indefinite, in fact something so personal that it feels different for everyone affected by it.

I hope that this little glimpse into my mind is useful, informative or at least just a little interesting for someone.

Take care of yourselves,

Jonah